Zip It!

Nothing is more appealing than speaking beautiful, life-giving words. For they release sweetness to our souls and inner healing to our spirits.
Proverbs 16:24 TPT

Early on in my profession, I was among many women struggling to gain respect and recognition in their careers. I was in a position that was ready for promotion as the next chair was becoming vacant. The majority ruled me as favorite and by all accounts, it was expected for me to be promoted. Unfortunately, there was an individual who did not want me in that position. A target had been placed on my back and, though subtle at first, the blows became very personal. For the following two months my work, integrity, gender, and intelligence were under fire.

It was extremely painful to walk through the front doors of my office day after day. The murmurs of my peers as they bought and magnified the lies of my perpetrator became unbearable. If I was promoted, I would have to report to this person, and that I could not do. I had no respect or trust in this person to lead me after the attack on my professionalism. Though my manager was in my corner and fought for me, she said, “Jennifer, the damage has been done”.

It starts with a bit of joking, a little sarcasm, and some teasing that gets carried away to painful places. Someone comes to you venting their frustrations over their coworker and opinions become slanderous. A friend at church brings up an individual struggling in their marriage and false assumptions are made. Hurt feelings gone unaddressed turn into bitter resentments that fuel hostility. I have been on the receiving end of the enemy’s painful blows and have been the one throwing the punches. It ends with damaged reputations, broken relationships, offenses, and consequences without remedy. James 3:5 (ESV), “Even so the tongue is a little member, and it can boast of great things. See how much wood or how great a forest a tiny spark can set ablaze!”

There is none without sin. We have all participated in conversations that are damaging because of gossip, false witnessing, lies, or slander. Believe me, this girl has had her battles in this area. Whichever adjective you choose to use – it is detestable to God. Our tongue is difficult to tame. James 3:8 (NIV), “…but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.”

Having the last word is no longer in style. Leaving the conversation early is trending. The greatest testimony we can give regarding controlling the tongue is to stop ourselves mid-sentence and just walk away.

What do we do? How do we control our impulse to talk trash? We turn it over to God continually. We acknowledge the sin habit, we confess it, and we ask for forgiveness. It breaks my heart to know that I have broken His because of my mouth. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can give a great testimony by stopping ourselves mid-sentence, apologizing, and exiting the conversation. Just walk away. Nothing like a dramatic exit to get someone’s attention. We can also change the course of the conversation by being the Light and Love of the Lord, bringing a new direction that builds each other up, instead of tearing each other down. We can also approach in love, seeking the truth, taking responsibility, and being Christ-like in working towards reconciliation.

Remember, His mercies are new every morning and His grace is continually available. 2 Corinthians 12:9, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” When our mouth runneth over, we can count on God to give us the strength we need to keep it zipped.